<9.0> I will always remember you
Long time no see everyone...school reopen liao....long time din update my post,just came back from penang...my father passed away on 4th Feb 2006(btw 4th Feb is my sister's birthday,so u can imagine how sad she was/is)
Stunned arent you?
So am i too.
He died of liver cancer.Terminal stage.Cant do chemo(too weak was his body,the doctor was afraid that chemo might end his life rightaway),cant do surgery(the tumors are everywhere on the liver)...his body weight kept dropping...thin until the eyeball became very big...can see his bones.....too skinny liao....the skin very yellowish(is jaundice i suppose coz the liver was almost completely damaged liao).....the urine very yellow+reddish until like teh-o already.He was too weak to walk to the toilet...the doctor asked us not to let him walk to toilet(even though he keep saying he wanna go toilet himself)...have to use the thing to wee wee 1....and later we switched to adult pampers coz he keep urinating on the bed....probably hard to tahan....or difficult for him to tell us that he wanna urinate.....i cant suffer for him...i can only see how uncomfortable and painful he was....i very sam tung..but there is nth i can do for him....i feel very useless....should have taken medical....(but my friends told me that even if i am a doctor..i also cant help him since the doctors in the hospital already stop giving medicine to treat cancer to him)
Some flashback :
In 2003 he was diagnosed of having rectum cancer.The doctor arranged a operation for him to remove the rectum that contained cancer.Then he underwent chemotherapy and radiotherapy. Everything went well. Soon he recovered from it.
Last year(2005),my uncle called.He said my father is sick again,this time is even more serious.Later i called him,he told me he is just fine.Just need to continue doing chemo and he will be ok.Later my sis told me that the cancer has spread to the liver...The doctor asked him to take chemotherapy(6 times,everytime the medicine is given intravenously into his veins,this is done every two weeks).After the course of chemo,the doctor said that the medicine is only controlling the size of the tumor,meaning the size is still the same,just that it didnt get bigger/worse.(chemotherapy is supposed to shrink the tumor....and if the doctor feels that the tumor is small enough,then he might consider surgically remove it/resection)
And then the doctor suggest him to do another 3 more chemotherapy on every two weeks basis also.The doctor arranged the first chemo for him on 16th January 2006.Too bad he cant wait until 16th....his condition already worsen....he was admitted to the hospital on 12th Jan.Dr said he was too weak for chemo.He survived for another 3 weeks plus....he passed away on 4th Feb 2006(which is my sis's brithday).
(Later i came to notice that there are many things(about his sickness) that i duno....even my aunt and uncles they all know better than me about his sickness.My aunts they all told me (during his funeral)that he dowan me to worry so much)
Nvm la...ppl will die eventually. At least he is not suffering anymore...maybe he is in heaven ,living happily and watching me rite now....i duno...but i just wanna ask/tell him.
"how are you,papa?? You ok now?"
"and i love you....will always always remember you"
So i hope that all of you who are reading this....cherish ur parents....be thankful.
Stunned arent you?
So am i too.
He died of liver cancer.Terminal stage.Cant do chemo(too weak was his body,the doctor was afraid that chemo might end his life rightaway),cant do surgery(the tumors are everywhere on the liver)...his body weight kept dropping...thin until the eyeball became very big...can see his bones.....too skinny liao....the skin very yellowish(is jaundice i suppose coz the liver was almost completely damaged liao).....the urine very yellow+reddish until like teh-o already.He was too weak to walk to the toilet...the doctor asked us not to let him walk to toilet(even though he keep saying he wanna go toilet himself)...have to use the thing to wee wee 1....and later we switched to adult pampers coz he keep urinating on the bed....probably hard to tahan....or difficult for him to tell us that he wanna urinate.....i cant suffer for him...i can only see how uncomfortable and painful he was....i very sam tung..but there is nth i can do for him....i feel very useless....should have taken medical....(but my friends told me that even if i am a doctor..i also cant help him since the doctors in the hospital already stop giving medicine to treat cancer to him)
Some flashback :
In 2003 he was diagnosed of having rectum cancer.The doctor arranged a operation for him to remove the rectum that contained cancer.Then he underwent chemotherapy and radiotherapy. Everything went well. Soon he recovered from it.
Last year(2005),my uncle called.He said my father is sick again,this time is even more serious.Later i called him,he told me he is just fine.Just need to continue doing chemo and he will be ok.Later my sis told me that the cancer has spread to the liver...The doctor asked him to take chemotherapy(6 times,everytime the medicine is given intravenously into his veins,this is done every two weeks).After the course of chemo,the doctor said that the medicine is only controlling the size of the tumor,meaning the size is still the same,just that it didnt get bigger/worse.(chemotherapy is supposed to shrink the tumor....and if the doctor feels that the tumor is small enough,then he might consider surgically remove it/resection)
And then the doctor suggest him to do another 3 more chemotherapy on every two weeks basis also.The doctor arranged the first chemo for him on 16th January 2006.Too bad he cant wait until 16th....his condition already worsen....he was admitted to the hospital on 12th Jan.Dr said he was too weak for chemo.He survived for another 3 weeks plus....he passed away on 4th Feb 2006(which is my sis's brithday).
(Later i came to notice that there are many things(about his sickness) that i duno....even my aunt and uncles they all know better than me about his sickness.My aunts they all told me (during his funeral)that he dowan me to worry so much)
Nvm la...ppl will die eventually. At least he is not suffering anymore...maybe he is in heaven ,living happily and watching me rite now....i duno...but i just wanna ask/tell him.
"how are you,papa?? You ok now?"
"and i love you....will always always remember you"
So i hope that all of you who are reading this....cherish ur parents....be thankful.
posted by walane | 10:05 PM
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